Is it okay NOT to date after the death of a spouse if you have small children? THOUGHTS?

I am just a little freaked because there are so many freaks and pedophiles these days, I do not want to date until my children are like 18 years old. Is this harmful to them do you think? Am I cheating them of having the other ';parent';? I don't think I am, but I have been accused of that. What are your thoughts?Is it okay NOT to date after the death of a spouse if you have small children? THOUGHTS?
I don't think you are cheating your children of another parent... They know who their father is and just because he's gone no one can replace him.... Sometimes its easier to date when your children are older because they understand better and they are out of the house already.... I do understand how you feel about having strangers around your children.. There is always a risk but i don't see why you can't date casually and not bring your boyfriend by your children until you been invovled for a long period of time and you are completely sure that he is a good guyIs it okay NOT to date after the death of a spouse if you have small children? THOUGHTS?
Wow, you have put yourself in a box, haven't you. All men are freaks and pedophiles and will just be dating you, to get at your children.


Sure their are those kind of people out there, but the percentage of them is really tiny, in the male population.


No one says you have to introduced some guy you are dating to your children on the first date or so. Go out on dates, some will be great, while other's not so much. But that's what dating is all about, finding out if the two of you make a good match.


You can tell your kids you are dating, and your date, that you have children. Who knows, he may have children of his own.


When you find the right guy, and have been with him for a while, then you can bring the kids into the mix.


Just don't cut yourself off, from a social life, you won't be happy, and your children wont be either.
I was widowed when my daughter was 7 in 1st grade. I understand the worry about protecting your children. Whether to date or not depends on if YOU are ready. As long as you act responsibly they will be okay.





You can be a great parent alone or with another mate. I didn't start dating till my daughter was in 7th grade, not because of her but simply because it took me that long to be ready and to find someone of quality that I was willing to date. Then I saw it as a way to provide a good role model for her to watch. (that was very sobering) He was the only one I dated after losing my first husband. We were married after my daughters freshman year.





Hope that helps. It can be a good life for you and your kids alone or with a step-parent. Remember better to be alone than to just settle, which is worse by far!
you shouldnt rush in to dating people just yet, they'll think that you forgotten the other person and hate you a lot. and its best to wait till ur kids are at least teenagers or so so they are old enough to understand whats goin on and be sure to choose that person you are dating very carefully.
Don't rush, but its still better then being single and miserable.
It was never a rule you had to date





Its up to you and no one else.