Would an ex-partner/lover establishing a friendship with your spouse bother you?

Would it bother you if your current spouse started up a friendship with your ex? Assume that there is no malicious intent involved and they shared some common activity or hobby, but now the friendship has a potential to grow into a very good one. Would this be too close for comfort? Under what circumstances is this a good or bad thing?Would an ex-partner/lover establishing a friendship with your spouse bother you?
I wouldn't like it. If someone is part of my past, I prefer they stay in the past.Would an ex-partner/lover establishing a friendship with your spouse bother you?
You mention that ';now the friendship has a potential to grow into a very good one';. Before it does, I would advise that it boils down to two things:


1)Does your spouse express concern over this renewed friendship? If she does, than you know it is warranted because of your history so there should be no argument there. Even if her pride would deny it, it's never far from her thoughts. If she voices concern, than no friendship should be worth the strain of marriage, particularly when there are children involved when tension builds in the home over this.





2) Do you trust yourself around this person? One thing I learned is that no matter how you may think you're made of steel, or how certain you are over your love for your spouse....there is always, on a subconscious level something missing, something that inevitably can be found, in someone new, especially in someone that we've bonded with before. Those ties that bind may not be very far from meeting again. Don't tempt fate.





Good luck.
One guy that claims to be my first husband (the Dude is a clown) is my husbands best friend.


Srsly If I had been married before this one I guess after all this time I really wouldnt have a problem with it


I would probably encourage it as my spouse seems to need constant attention from me and never wants to do things with others..sometimes its flattering most times its smothering.


When he does go off with his one friend I feel kinda ';funny'; hangin with two men..at all these gun shops etc.


If I had a previous spouse I know that their friendship would be about other things besides me..I realized long ago that everything was not just about me.
He can be friends with my ex but he's not being friends with his ex. I'm not insecure and I fully trust my sweetie but the woman is shady and we don't need her in our lives.





I don't have to worry about this because my sweetie hates my ex and with good reason but if they for some odd reason did become friends that is fine with me as long as he didn't disrespect me because of it.
No. I think it would be a good idea especially if you have kids with that ex. My cousin married a divorced guy with 2 little kids. She felt sorry for his ex on Christmas because she was alone and invited her to share in the fun at their home. They have since become good friends. It's so good for the kids if you can make it work.
no, but i would no longer have anything to do with either of them





because in my situation, I am divorced from the spouse and know that he is not a good person.
I dont see anything wrong with it if your spouse is ok with it. What would be a bad idea is you feeling anything for the ex. If it bothers you you should stop it and your spouse should respect that.
No. In fact, I have one of these. My ex is more of an off and on again friend with benefits and my husband knows they are both important to me. My husband welcomes my friends





LOL.. or he can hit the road!
Definitely too close for comfort.
The distraction of imagining a threesome might just be actually a little bit possible....but no, it would never...but still...you've each been....maybe if....


Yeah, distraction. :-D
Definitely too close for comfort
It might be a good thing, but it would bother me. Still, it's someone else's life, not mine, so I wouldn't try to stop it.
Nothing good will come of it for you.
Does not compute... been married 24 years.....
I think it could be very beneficial if children are involved. I had a relationship that was amicable with my 2nd husbands ex, and this allowed us to communicate about their children and stay on the same page. We weren't ';friends'; but we were amicable when we were together. I think it helped with the children.





I wouldn't care if my husband had a relationship with my ex, but that won't happen - they have no common interests and my children are grown now.